Tuesday I biked to the mailbox to get mail. I'm glad I installed that basket on the front of Amanda's Raleigh, because it made the job very simple and easy. Then I biked around the parking lot for just a couple of laps. The big ride on Monday made me feel sore to sit on the bicycle saddle, and I didn't want to do much.
Today I biked one heavy garbage bag to the dumpster, using my bike because it is the only one capable of carrying more than four pounds. I've strapped a large wicker basket to the bread rack with zip ties, and it works well to hold a full wastebasket for a short trip like this.
If I believed in cheating in this challenge, today would have been a cheat, because I only biked up to the dumpster and coasted back home and called it good. Today it has been raining all day, and I'm depressed as hell, so I just didn't want to bother. Still, that's three days straight that I at least did leave the house, and pedalling action happened.
This blog is supposed to be about my growth as a cyclist, so I'll make this sidebar brief. Johan has decided to break up with me. My heart is severely broken over it, and I'm trying to put on a brave face, but it hurts so badly I cannot breathe sometimes. I'm oversleeping a lot, and eating more carbs than I should, because that's my standard way of dealing with being massively depressed. Oh, and in case I forgot to keep everyone up to date on the timing of this whole thing, he is NOT visiting at this time. Just about the time I was expecting him to come for his second attempt to visit me was the time he decided he was done with this relationship and he wasn't coming. I'm really floored over it, because we didn't even have a fight or anything. He just woke up last Wednesday or so and decided he'd had enough of talking to me and being in love, so that was it. It took me this long to even begin to believe this is really happening.
So he wants to stay friends. Part of me wants to stay friends, because I still love him, and I can't help but think if maybe I keep the channels of communication open somehow this might all resolve itself someday. But part of me is simply crushed, because this isn't the first time I've been dumped like this, and I wonder if trying to stay friends with him is sheer masochism on my part.
I'll try not to talk about that any more, unless there's a major change. I wouldn't have said anything at this time, except in my joy at falling in love with him I did mention him here before, and I thought folks should not be left with the impression that things were still that way.
Tomorrow I will try to muster the gumption to make a real bike outing. I need to do some banking, and my bank is right next to Wal-Mart, so that will be a decent run for me to make. That round-trip isn't too terribly strenuous, and I won't be carrying a cartload of groceries. I might even do it on my daughter's bike, which is so much lighter for non-cargo riding.
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